Jiji The Brave Arrives, and It Is Scandalous

[camels don't know what date it is --ed. Chronolectus]

Today when Bee'eed sat on my hump I spat more. Oh camel-nosed sand, an impression of my desire that was once primal but is now more civilized, I had bowed to her feet as she approached, placing the front of my camel-long face against the desert floor. I had submissively lowered my head for her to get on, essentially displaying my lust for her primitive cave-girl-beauty. When she had perched upon my front hump I raised up with both legs and as I felt her tight cave-girl-grip I gave a long spit, a shower of brown, attempting to communicate to her what might be said through the spoken word as, "Yes baby, squeeze harder." or "I love you. Will you marry me?"

Since the Serene Days, I have been relaying messages back and forth between the Angry Scots and Cap'n Tariq's assemblege of "warriors". Months ago, I found them here in the Empty Square of Inner Klem. They were awaiting judgment, and up until this moment nothing has changed. Tariq continues to make vulgar gestures towards passing women, not as a sign of his attraction to them but as a bitter reference to the younger more lively and sexually active members of our group (i.e. the Scot, who has made quite a name for himself among the ladies. I am guessing this is not only because of his over all bodily girth, but also because of his amiable accent and unbelievably sexy ability to lose all inhibitions at the faintest whiff of alcohol). The cave girls continue to rub my shaven, missive-carved sides with aloe mixtures containing burnt sand, spit, and Love Juice. As they continue this healing process, my desire to "make love" or as some say "camel-fuck" increases. I have decided to cut off communication with the Angry Scots for one reason: the cave girls are the object of my desire and I will stay near them. Especially Bee'eed. Especiialy after she squeezed my front hump so hard today.

One problem: Cap'n Tariq has also taken an admiration to the cave girls. They gave him a massage in Love Juice hours ago. He does not yet know of my desire for Bee'eed, but I fear he soon will.

For future generations, preferrably scholars and historians, that may find my writings: A true internalization of language occured in me during my time spent carrying messages carved into my flesh. Missive-carving after missive-carving, I began to understand, through direct force and other ways, certain sentiments and eventually meanings of words. I cannot speak them, but know how to write them. I remember how they felt and which direction their lines went. On the edge of town are slabs of mud in which I now camel-scrawl my thoughts. Let it be known that compared to Cap'n Tariq I love Bee'eed more. And I loved her first.

May this message be recorded as my first contribution to the many recorded events of my comrades.